My first “Real Talk!” I want to make sure that I write more than the practical, instructional tips I’ve learned in my few short years of worship leading. That’s why I’ve decided to write “Real Talk” articles every once in awhile. The purpose of these will be more spiritual aspects of leading worship – specifically, the spiritual parts that we often find difficult. Are you with me? Great! Keep reading.
You cannot lead your congregation into intimacy w/God PUBLICLY if you don’t already experience it PRIVATELY.
Often, you’ll read me referring to my wise pastor, Lindell Cooley. I refer to him because he’s one of the most anointed AND gifted worship leaders I have ever known. In the five years I’ve attended Grace Church: Nashville under his leadership, I’ve learned countless lessons about worship. One of the most oft-repeated points is that intimacy with God must first start alone, in your private time with God, if you ever expect to lead anyone else into intimacy with Him.
Comparatively (at least for me), it’s much easier to stand in front of a large crowd of people and ‘sing pretty’ than it is to discipline myself to develop a daily practice of private worship to God. I make dozens of excuses – I’m too busy, I have to make enough money to live, I don’t live alone, I’m trying to do ministry at church and so it’s okay – but the reality of the situation is much simpler, and much harder to admit.
My tendency is to avoid privately worshipping God because it forces me into vulnerability.
Vulnerability is hard. It’s rewarding, but it’s also painful.
I read somewhere this very stark description of what intimate love really is. (This refers to the way you love your spouse, but can be applied to most other relationships, including yours with God.)
“True, intimate love is being so vulnerable that you give another person the ability to completely annihilate you (for they know the deepest parts of you), and trusting that they will do the opposite.”
Perhaps that’s not a great definition. But I’ve thought back on it many times, because it reminds me that if I love my husband, or my mother, or my best friend… or God… that I should be willing to show them the raw, unmasked reality of who I am. Otherwise, relationships remain surface-level.
However, the more important half of this relationship is not my side. Ultimately, His pleasure is my delight, and I know that He is jealous for my attention. In my own life, that has been made clear in times where God has drastically kept me invisible from certain opportunities and ministries. In the midst of those times, I could not understand why I felt so blocked from “operating in my calling.”
It was all a matter of perspective.
David says the following in Psalm 42:1-5, 8b:
“As the deer pants for the water brooks, so my soul pants for You, O God. My soul thirsts for God, for the living God; When shall I come and appear before God? My tears have been my food day and night, while they say to me all day long, “Where is your God?” These things I remember and I pour out my soul within me. For I used to go along with the throng and lead them in procession to the house of God, With the voice of joy and thanksgiving, a multitude keeping festival. Why are you in despair, O my soul? And why have you become disturbed within me? Hope in God, for I shall again praise him For the help of His presence… His song will be with me in the night, A prayer to the God of my life.”
That sounds a lot like a worship leader who has found his soul downcast within him. For more clarity, I looked at these verses in a few different versions of scripture, and found this interpretation of verse 4 (in the Amplified Bible):
“…how I went slowly before the throng and led them in procession to the house of God [like a bandmaster before his band, timing the steps to the sound of music and the chant of song], with the voice of shouting and praise.”
That’s definitely a worship leader. And yet, David, in the bloodline of Christ, King of Israel, a man that millennia of God’s people have quoted and sung and looked to, found himself yearning to simply appear before God.
Not to appear before a congregation of thousands.
Not to sing at his favorite venue.
Not for a standing ovation.
But for the opportunity to come and appear before God.
This man of God teaches a lesson that should be apparent to anyone who ministers publicly to a church body. When he recalls the joyous, congregational moments of praise he led in the past, his thirst and desperation were for God alone. As it should be with us.
This leads me to my original point: if you want to effectively lead God’s people in worship, you must seek intimacy with Him privately first.
I write, not only to encourage a life of private worship, but also to communicate how vital this practice is in regards to how it affects your public ministry. James 4:8a says, “Draw near to God and He will draw near to you.”
Plain. Simple. And necessary.
In Jeremiah 32, the prophet was confined in the court of the guard because the king of Judah did not want anyone to hear Jeremiah’s prophetic word. With no platform, Jeremiah continued to stay faithful to God – operating in his calling even when no one else could see.
The second time God spoke to him in this season of hiddenness, He stated one of the most powerful phrases I could ever have imagined to hear from the voice of God about the importance of intimacy with Him:
‘Call to Me and I will answer you, and I will tell you great and mighty things, which you do not know.’
That’s the kind of worship leader I want to worship with – one who is only concerned with God’s pleasure and glory, a man or woman seeking God in every moment, regardless of their platform.
And it’s the kind I insist on being – because nothing else is good enough for the King.
I will leave you with a quote from my pastor that describes this entire philosophy:
“Why is it that we become so concerned with leading worship in front of certain people or at certain places?
“Do you realize that, as a worship leader, the best privileges you have are the moments alone in your room, with just you and God, where you have the opportunity to minister to the King of Kings?
“To me, that blessing is the one that matters. Every chance I have to lead God’s people in worship is secondary to the honor I have in entertaining the King Himself.”
// Lindell Cooley
